ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
