My nipple is on Facebook.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
i've created a new STD.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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