Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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