Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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