I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
