It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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