It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize