I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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