so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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