I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
