I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Randomize
