So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Can't talk, ducks in the car
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Randomize
