I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
