I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Randomize
