Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I need to wash the frat house off of me
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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