Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Bring me that man meat
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Randomize
