if you like me you must not know who I am
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I would ride that face into the sunset
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize