and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
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