yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i barfeds in our rink
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Randomize