Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
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