You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize