Buhtt sex?
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Randomize
