I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
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