jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
