Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
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