I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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