i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
That reminds me...we need to get swords
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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