plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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