Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
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