if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
