i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
