i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize