she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
