How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
