Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
