Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Randomize
