super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
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