Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
