You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
