and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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