I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Randomize
