I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
