She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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