hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize