Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
