Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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