My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
I understand Curling. That high.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Randomize
