I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
