Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Enjoy the penises
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Randomize
