One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
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